10 Years

Tomorrow is the 10 year anniversary of my mother’s passing. The anniversaries are getting easier to handle but I always notice a shift in my mood in the Spring season that doesn’t fully lift until the first day of Summer, which is my mother’s birthday. The entire season is a string of reminders of not having her around.

So many things and events have happened within the last decade that I wish she could have seen. There are also so many incidents I wish I could have asked her advice on or used her shoulder to cry on. At the very least, I wish she could have outlived her terrible father. But on the other hand, I’m glad she wasn’t around to see the Trump administration or experience the pandemic. I think the pandemic would have definitely killed her in some capacity.

She always stated she never wanted to see her 50th birthday because she was afraid of getting old and looking old. The woman was vain as hell, and I thought karma would have its way and she would live to be 80. Weirdly enough she got her wish when she died three months shy of her 50th birthday. I have no idea how she would be if she lived to push 60.

Here’s to my mother who lived, made all of us laugh. and taught me how to love (I’m also glad she died before the phrase “Live, Laugh, Love” gained traction, that would have been extremely her shit).